As only one example of how this may be true, I’d like to remind everyone about the story of how my current wife and I met. I had moved into my mother’s home in Pratt, Kansas, because I fled St. Louis, Missouri after my 8 month engagement to a woman I passionately loved fell apart. It collapsed because I caught her cheating on me, and then she chose the other guy over me. I was heartbroken, and struggling to get my feet back on solid ground. My current wife was a librarian at the local community college, where I’d enrolled in a few arts classes.
We became friends, and hung out frequently. But, until she made it clear that she wanted more out of our relationship, I had not even considered the possibility. Her actions made me take a hard look at the situation. I realized that I had 2 choices – the first being that I could ignore her interest and continue to harbor my wounded pride over the loss of the prior engagement. The second choice was to take a chance on possibly being happy with someone who obviously wanted to be with me, despite the baggage I brought to the relationship. I had to spend several days considering those options.
In the end, I took a chance on being happy with her. It has proved to be one of the smartest decisions of my life.